times like these…

Hey im here to write my life and story. in the past i have been inflicted by people’s ignorance, hatred, and insensitivity through blogs and websites and am a little wary of these things but i feel i am ready to put myself back out there(speaking in the most lame terms-blog) and expressing myself. life for me these last few weeks have been hard. i have struggled, trying to be a good example of God’s love, honesty, and strength but each time i feel like i am finally getting my life in order, the devil- circumstance- brings obstacles in my way. it has been over a year since my last car related accident and if you know me from when i was younger, you know that is a big feat- haha- but i finally felt that i was able to start over, had learned from my experiences and accidents, and was going to be able to be accident-free for awhile- sure enough monday morning while running errands, getting rucker’s bday present, i avoided hitting a handicap van and a cop car to hit a curb… CURB!!! and the ironic thing of it is that i did more damage to my car than had i hit the freaking car!!! well its now friday- almost saturday(my 21st birthday) and i am carless for five more days!!! you know people tell you all the time that God gives you tests and the devil tries to temp you and you must be strong and come out shining by sometimes i feel that i never get a break. It is now half way through the summer and i have not had one bit of vacation yet. i work and go to school alllllll the time. sometimes you just wonder…. where is this silver lining in the rain? where is my prince charming, when am i going to get a break from all these problems. ok ok i know i am moaning and complaining, being a typical girl, but guess what- we all are allowed to complain sometimes, all allowed to take a step back and have a pity party every once in a while. im normally someone who hides my problems, yes i am passionate and around my friends i cry, but the truth of the matter is that i seldom release my problems on my friends, always trying to make their lives better and be there for them, when i am putting my problems on the backburner, only for me to deal with. so there! haha i am putting it out there.